Conversations in the Blogosphere

Comment #1: Posted on the article, "When greeting others, ditch the 'unpleasant pleasantries"

This article creates a lot of food for thought!  It’s true that you can ask for, and expect, an authentic response from “How are you?”, but if the expectation isn’t reciprocal, it can be awkward, or seen as over-sharing.  “How are you?” doesn’t always offer up an interesting conversation topic either.  I’m more inspired by tsavadogo’s suggestion of “What are you reading?” because it is specific, it is personal, you get a chance to build a connection, and also learn from other people.

An unusual repartee – as Beth suggested – can also be amusing and put people at ease.  Whenever someone asks my father how he’s doing, he enthusiastically responds with “I’m living the dream!”  Though it doesn’t offer much for follow-up conversation, it almost always inspires a laugh or a smile.


Comment #2: Posted on the article, "Why you can no longer separate your personal life from your professional life online"

This blog post is helping me out with an internal struggle I've been having recently.  My struggle runs parallel to your common question, as my worry has been less about how to separate personal and professional identities, but how to integrate them.

To give you a bit if background, I've been working in the non-profit sector, in a feminist community health centre, for the last 8 years.  I recently began studying public relations with a hope to improve outreach and communication, and to help support work being done in non-profits.  However, as a PR student, I've also been exposed to a lot of directives and advice on what it means to be a "professional", many of which seem to conflict with my personal values, and the values of the organization I work for.  A lot of the important work that we is focused on speaking about taboo subjects, and on breaking down the superficial barriers that divide, stereotype, and dehumanize people.  A lot of what I've read elsewhere about being keeping your personal image "professional", however, seems to be more about appearances than authenticity, and about keeping distance between your lived experience and your professional image.  Ironically enough, to be authentic to my own values, and to the values of my organization, would in many cases seem unprofessional.  Quite the dilemma, isn't it?

I much prefer your suggestion - that personal and professional, online and off, can't be separated.  I agree that online integrity is a much better paradigm than online privacy, because it does create the need to think, and reflect, about who you are and want to be (both personally and professionally) and be sure that what you're saying and doing is truly from YOU, and is aligned with your values, even if it includes random cute cat postings.  In a framework of integrity and accountability, there's much less of a chance of being fake and of exposing fakery, because as you stated, you are being who you really are.

To answer your question, I believe that to date, I have tried to have somewhat of a separation between personal and professional, and that stemmed from being unsure of who I was - or what my goals were - in each realm.  But as they're coming together, I'm striving for more integration, and more integrity.

Thank you for sharing your insight!


Comment #3: Posted on the article: "10 easy ways to network in the real world'

This post is so helpful and insightful, and I think you’ve really captured some useful tips for introverts and extroverts alike!   I agree that it’s important to maintain personal connections, and that in our age of counting friends and followers, these important steps in building and sustaining connections are often overlooked.

 

I was at an event a little while ago, and I arrived early – before anyone I knew was there yet.   I consider myself a highly social person, but small talk and “polite”, neutral conversation (about, say, the weather) have never been things that came easily or naturally to me.  In this instance, I made the decision to simply approach someone and start a conversation.  I asked questions, and listened, and before long I discovered that I held some common interests with the people I met.  I also found, later on, that it was far easier to recall their names and the things that were important to them, because I was actively – and genuinely - listening and conversing, and not just going through a mental checklist of the ground I would need to cover in order to make a superficial connection.  The second part of following up is something that I don’t think I’ve valued as much as I should, but I will definitely be bookmarking and reviewing your tips for the next time(s) I feel that I may be at a loss.  Thank you!


Comment #4: Posted on the article: "How to control an audience with your eyes".

I’ve noticed a lot of these techniques used in live performance, in theatre quite obviously, but also with live music.  If a guitar player is about to launch into a solo, oftentimes the lead singer will look over at them, or turn their whole body towards them.  This does have the effect (in addition to the audio cues of the solo) of directing the audience’s attention to another area of the stage.  Of course, even with the added benefit of instruments and a wider range of expression than a formal presentation, these gestures of direction and connection can go awry.  For example, I’ve noticed a lot of bass players who simply turn their back to the audience for a portion of the song, and I ask, why?  Some singers will also close their eyes – which seems to convey a different level of intensity, or other-worldliness – but I will definitely take this in through a different lens (pardon the pun) after considering the power of eyes.

Although I’ve considered a lot of these techniques in terms of creative performance, I’ve never put the two together in terms of considering parallel techniques for public speaking!  I’ve always heard that maintaining eye contact is key, so it’s really interesting to consider how redirecting your gaze can affect the audience’s gaze.  Thank you for this post!